MY DOG CAN SPEAK! LISTEN!

Believe me or not, guys, but my dog Canaille can speak and he is pretty good at it!

His  favourite hangout to have a chat with me is the kitchen.

I'm an early riser, but even in the wee hours of the morning, when I step into the kitchen, I'm quite sure to come across him.

Sometimes I wonder if he was not about to raid the fridge, but I have never caught him red-handed (and red-pawed, either).

Anyway, my suspicions are quickly swept away by his innocent eyes looking down at his bowl, up at me and down at his bowl again, as if saying :

   " Good morning, Sleeping Beauty! I thought you would never wake   up! You know, I've been fasting since last night, and I really need to fuel up. Can't you hear my tummy rumbling ? So, if you don't mind, we'll have a real talk later ".

OK, then! While I am sipping my first cup of tea, he swallows down his morning bowl, and once done with it, he gives me a big ' Hope you'll repeat the invitation ' thank you.

                        

At lunch and dinner time, that good guest is back in the kitchen, ready to help and chat.

" You're taking the chopping board out ? Well, don't worry, Mum, if you drop one of those mouth-watering things you're cutting, I'll clean up the floor ".

" What are you stirring ? It smells delicious!".

You see, that guy always finds the right word to cheer up the lousy cook I am.

Don't misunderstand me. Canaille doesn't open his mouth just to play the food critic.

When I am brooding or worrying, he is quick at noticing it, and never fails to put his paw on my lap and say :

  " Come on, Mum, let's go outside and play a good ' Fetch the ball ' game. Sure, you'll realize all is not gloom and doom today! ".

That sweetheart has really a zest for life and today he has told me to share his dogylosophy with all of you, so here it is :

A SHORT THRILLER

Some years ago, I used to live in a village in the middle of nowhere. My nextdoor neighbour was friendly, but as deaf as a post. I mean, I knew I couldn't rely on him if I shouted for help. Fortunatelty the case had never arisen.

One night, my husband was on a business trip and I was alone at home. As there was nothing much on telly, I decided to go to bed to read the thriller I had just bought. The bookseller had told me it was a fast pace, tightly written novel that would keep me reading long into the night.

He was quite right. Not only was the story riveting, but the unexpected plot twists kept me turning the pages !

Unfortunately, a glance at the alarm-clock warned me that, if I didn't want to wake up with puffy eyes ( I had a busy morning ahead of me), it was high time to switch off the light.

After rolling and tossing a while ( I was still in the thriller), sleep was about to come, when suddenly I heard a weird noise, and a kind of muffled conversation !!

I tiptoed downstairs and found the dog up in his basket, growling and shaking with fear ( at the time he was just a puppy, not a watch-dog yet ..). I could still hear the voices !

Sure, there were burglars in the living-room. I slowly crept across the hall to the kitchen to fetch something to defend myself. As I was about to open the knife drawer, I got knocked on the nape of the neck !!

My heart dropped to the pitch of my stomach, but the blow was not that strong and I didn't faint.

Yet, I was petrified and unable to turn back to face my attacker.

The conversation was still going on in the living-room,so it meant the man behind me had at least two accomplices !!

Well, if I was about to die, why not die bravely ?

I screwed up my courage and turned back slowly ...

In a split second, my 'serial killer' was lying on the floor ! I heaved a sigh of relief !!

Before going to bed I had swept the floor and forgot to put the broom away.When entering the kitchen, I had stepped on the brush, and it had made the stick tilt and knock my head !!

But yet, in the other room the intruders were still taking it easy ...

I grabbed a carving knife, burst into the living-room, switched on the light ...no soul around ! Just a light on the radio !

Jeez ! When switching it off with the remote control, I had pressed the wrong function ! Instead of turning it off, I had turned it down !

Phew !! The thriller recommended by my bookseller had really set my imagination to a fever ! I should have chosen a fairy tale !
The Sleeping Beauty, for example ...