A BEDTIME STORY

Hi everydoggy,

My name is Canaille. I am an English Springer Spaniel and Perky, this blog's owner, is my mum.

I enjoy sharing my adventures with you and your comments always make my day even if some are a bit teasing. Look at the little tip Francoise Z., a caring reader, sent me last week :

                "Watch your weight greedy Canaille!!!"

Thank you dear Françoise, but unfortunately one more time the saying "words are wasted on a starving dog " * has  proved true!

Here is what happened :

I'm crazy about car rides, so yesterday when Daddy opened the car door, I jumped onto the rear seat, ready for a new adventure, and all the more excited as we didn't take the road to the vet or to the groomer!

Then Daddy stopped in front of the chemist's and said that he wouldn't be long.

OMG, the chemist's is close to the baker's and soon the sweet smell of their mouth-watering kouignardises (a Breton specialty) started  tickling my nose and my taste-buds!

https://www.facebook.com/La-Kouignardise-301708713885541

...What could I do but jump onto the front seat and try to break the glove box open? 

I know Perky often hides treats there.

It was not an easy job and I scratched so hard that my paws still hurt. But it was worth it!

Finally the glove box opened and I found myself in front of a big pawful* of sweets.

Never seen that kind before, so it was just like "blind tasting", but after all, "the proof of the pudding is in the eating".

When I heard Daddy's footsteps, I jumped back onto the rear seat and pretended to sleep while my delicious booty was melting in my mouth.

I was so good at pretending to sleep that actually I fell asleep!

I slept like a log and when I woke up, I was back home in my comfy basket where Daddy had certainly put me two hours before. 

I was as calm as ever but that was the calm before the storm named Perky (aka my mum) struck.

She was furious with me, cause she said I had eaten all the rescue remedy pastilles she takes when in need of some help with stress or anxiety.

Jeez, that's why those so-called sweets had turned me into a kind of Sleeping Beauty (congratulating oneself is uplifting))!

Zzzzz….Oops, sorry I have nearly fallen asleep again, and yet if I want to be in Perky's good books again, I must sleep with one eye open!

So next time you give me advice, I promise I will follow it!

* Dog-English translation :

Words are wasted on a starving dog  = Words are wasted on a starving man.

A pawful of sweets = a handful of sweets.

WHAT'S ON TV TODAY?

Hi everydoggy,

My name is Canaille the darling dog of the blogosphere and Perky, this blog's owner, is my mum.

This week I'll drop just a few lines because I'm on the watch!

Don't get me wrong, I'm not a guard dog.

First off I think I was not born for the job.

And then, anyway, I'm too busy chasing the cookies to pay attention to the cheeeky rabbits who ruin Perky's flower-beds!

No, today I'm on the watch because Perky is in the kitchen and I must not take off my eyes off her.

You see,for me the kitchen is a strategic location.

If I manage to  sneak in, two possibilities.

Either I whine and make sheep's eyes at Perky , and then I can expect to earn my crust.

Or, much better, Perky is on a good day and she turns on the  kitchen telly.

As soon as my series is on, I keep glued to the screen!

Every time it is a brand new story, and in the leading part there is always a glamorous actress or a handsome actor.

Each episode is a real cliffhanger, and even though I know that suspense is bad for my old ticker, I can't help watching it till the end.

Unfortunately, it is always the same end and it leaves me frustrated, cause Perky turns off the telly, takes the main character in her arms and says in a dull voice :

      " Sorry, Canaille, but what comes out of the oven  is not for you! "

Why on earth isn't  the oven channel for me? Is it the same in your place? Please tell me!

DOG-FORBIDDEN

Hi everydoggy,

My name is Canaille. I am an English Springer Spaniel and Perky, this blog-owner is my mum.

I am in a blue funk. Spring is on and I can't even make the most of our garden.

You see, Perky is not the kind of girl to beat around the bush and whatever my attempts to paw out and laze in the grass, it is the same old tune every time. 

Her " Sorry, Canaille, today the garden is dog-forbidden " leaves me dumbfounded and pawfully* sad.

Where have all the good times gone?

Impawssible*  now to enjoy a good fetch-the-ball game or even chew some tender roots!

In the early mornings I just have time to water the flowers* and put some fertilizer*on the new flower-bed before the sharp-toothed roaring monsters invade the garden!

And then, they spend hours digging huge holes along the alleys and filling them up with loads of stones.

Believe me or not, instead of scolding them, Perky congratulates them!

Even worse, at tea-time she lets them in for a drink and cookies! 

I bark at them, but Perky tells me to leave the workers quiet, cause they work hard in the garden and they need a good break!

Poor girl! I think she is going nuts! Since when has digging holes in the garden been rewarded with cookies??

Fortunately one of the monster-drivers is a good guy and never fails to share one of his treats with me.

Of course, he doesn't speak dog fluently, so to get a treat I have to scratch his leg and drool on his trousers a little more than usual, but as long as Perky doesn't see, everything is rosy in the garden again!!

That's all for now. Looking forward to your  comments.

                    

           Canaille, the darling of the blogosphere.

* For the readers who don't speak dog, here are some useful translations :

pawfully                                awfully

impawssible                          impossible

to water the flowers             to pee

to put some fertilizer            to poo